First Meeting

I went to my first meeting last night and it was different. It was a first three step meeting.

The first step has two clauses that are true for me. A) I admitted that I'm powerless over alcohol. B) My life was becoming unmanageable.

The second step is one that I've already held before alcohol problems. There is definitely a power greater than me that is capable of restoring me. I didn't need a meeting to know this.

The third step is the one that I've been trying to do recently to varying degrees of success. I'm trying to turn over my will and life over to God.

There are two problems I seemed to get hung up on in the meeting. The first, is the notion that I want to stop drinking. I don't. I want to get over the alcohol problems so that I can lead a normal life and that means the occasional drink. I don't ask for abstinence. I ask for wisdom and power to overcome any bit that is controlled by alcohol. The second is the clause in the third step. "God as we understood Him". I don't want to get picky, but the "spirituality" of this meeting seemed bankrupt to me. It was like an apple without a core. There is no rootedness without God as He is, not as I understand Him.

My prayer is for godliness. Help me Lord to be godly.