Psalm 7:14-16
"Whoever is pregnant with evil conceives trouble and gives birth to disillusionment. Whoever digs a whole and scoops it out falls into the pit they have made. The trouble they cause recoils on them; their violence comes down on their own heads."
I've always been aware that the Bible teaches, especially in the Old Testament, that the sinners often find themselves suffering from their own sins. Even when they set out to do others harm, they do themselves the harm. But, verse 14 hit at me this week in reading. "Whoever is pregnant with evil conceives trouble and gives birth to disillusionment". I think with some of the mistakes I've made recently I'm finding that I have conceived trouble for myself and given birth to disillusionment. I've been disenchanted, disenfranchised and disillusioned with many things going on, especially work related recently. And I thought it had a lot to do with the stagnation at work, but I think that this verse, in light of my recent struggles has pinned down the root cause and it has nothing to do with work at all.
So my prayer for today is for my God to come and rescue me from the evil that I have become impregnated with. I find myself embarrassed and ashamed of it have ever occurring but I find that I can't deny or explain it away. It comes to the point where I must stand up and apologize and beg forgiveness for falling away. Not on account of any righteousness within me, but simply because the feeling of disillusionment, this state of being, is so painful, it has rendered me broken. So I ask for forgiveness Lord. Wash away the stain of sin and cleanse me from the evil I have engaged with and become entangled by. Do not let my decisions deprive me of my belief that gives hope. Do not let me sink further into this pit I have dug. Hear my prayer.
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